The Dress and Girls with Boobs are Mean

My nephew is getting married this evening and I was having the hardest time finding a dress.  When you’re in your ~cough ~ 40 ~ cough ~ somethings (29) it’s hard finding a dress.  Dresses are either for the hot skinny 20 something year old or something my Grandmother would wear.

I saw this dress on Haley Heath from Family Traditions on the The Sportsman Channel, so I sent Haley an email message asking where she got her dress.  Please note; she was not wearing it on the Sportsman Channel.  Although, I would.  Anyway, I never bought the dress because I would never look as nice as Haley in it and my outdoor friends would say … Hey!  I saw Haley in that same dress.  So I never ordered “her” dress.

Then I saw this dress …

And  I thought …

I so want that dress!

Umm …

Jody …

You’re not 20 something.

And …

Umm …

What if you have to bend over?

Hey!  Did you see Johnny’s Aunt dropped her drink?  Hahaha And what in the world is she doing wearing a thong?  What is she 50?


I love that dress.


I might just buy it to wear around the house.

While vacuuming.

With the blinds closed.

While no one is home.

Anyway, I’ve tried on more dresses than I care to remember.  And I made the mistake of taking my mother (Dolly Sr.) and sister (Dolly Jr.) with shopping.  I mistakenly talked them both into trying on dresses and all heard from their dressing rooms were them yelling  …

Dolly Sr:  Oh my heavens.  I can’t get my boobs in this.

Dolly Jr:  If my boobs weren’t so big, they might fit in this dress.

Dolly Sr:  Oh for heavens sake.  The top is too tight.

Dolly Jr:  Boobs won’t fit.

Blah blah blah

My boobs are too big!

Boobs boobs boobs

Anyway, I found a dress …


And both my mother and sister said …

Dolly’s:  That dress is stuffy.

Flat as the pancake house:  Ugh … Yea … well … I’m not one to let my girls hang out.

Dolly’s:  Sorry. hahahaha

I’m never going shopping with them ever again.

And then where did THEY want to go eat after our shopping adventure …


Have a good day all … and a wonderful weekend!!!

And I promise not to talk about boobs next week.


10 thoughts on “The Dress and Girls with Boobs are Mean”

  1. Going to Hooters for the food is like reading Marvel comic books for the intellectually stimulating prose. Either way, you’re going to be disappointed. As for the boobs, some of us guys prefer “normal” sized boobs instead of oversized boobs.

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